From the Depths of the Dark Night of the Soul to Becoming a Knight of Faith

This is where I begin: my darkest nights are at an end, and my days are a forever sunrise. I bask in the light of a billion stars and want to share that light with others. My name is Adam Perrell, founder and coach of Coaching Through, a practice dedicated to helping individuals and organizations engage in reflective, mindful change. Drawing on principles from my experiences as an educator and leader, I guide my clients through their personal and professional evolutions by helping them learn from their own experiences. My coaching practice is part of a larger journey—a hero’s journey. If our lives are narratives, I map mine to Joseph Campbell’s Hero’s Journey and the Cosmogenic Cycle, making sense of my transformation through the wisdom of great thinkers I’ve studied and the stories others have shared with me.

While I frame my experiences through these lenses, I recognize that each individual views their journey differently. Part of my practice is to listen deeply to the stories my clients tell, helping them make sense of their unique paths in ways that feel authentic and meaningful to them.

The journey from the “dark night of the soul” to becoming a “knight of faith” reflects the stages of transformation in the Hero’s Journey and the cycles of the cosmogenic myth. The term “dark night of the soul” originates from St. John of the Cross, a 16th-century Spanish mystic and poet who described it as a profound spiritual crisis marked by disconnection from God or meaning. For me, it began with profound loss: the death of my partner, the unraveling of my career, and the collapse of the life I thought I was building. These events plunged me into my own abyss—a place of existential disconnection and despair. In the Hero’s Journey, this is the descent: the confrontation with the void. Similarly, in the Cosmogenic Cycle, it is the dissolution of the old world, where structures of meaning are dismantled to make space for something new.

This period wasn’t just suffering—it was a necessary unraveling of the illusions and attachments that had once defined me. In losing control, I was forced to confront what truly matters and face the terrifying freedom of the unknown.

Emerging from this abyss is not about conquering it, but surrendering to it. Søren Kierkegaard’s “knight of faith” provides a powerful metaphor for this leap: trusting in the paradoxes and uncertainties of life, even when the way forward is unclear. This leap is a radical act of faith—a commitment to live authentically in the face of fear and contradiction. Like the Hero crossing the threshold, or the cosmogenic world re-forming out of chaos, this transformation requires courage, humility, and trust. For me, it meant rebuilding a life not on certainty, but on values that emerged from the void: love, connection, and purpose. Meaning isn’t handed to us—it is created, lived, and constantly evolving.

As a coach, I help others navigate their own dark nights, thresholds, and transformations. Whether my clients face grief, career shifts, or the evolution of identity, I draw from my own journey to guide them toward renewal. The dark night teaches us to sit with uncertainty and trust that what feels like an ending is often a beginning. Like the Hero or the knight of faith, the process requires openness to growth, surrender to what we cannot control, and the courage to leap. Change can be scary; courage is the way through.

My work centers on helping clients discover their values, embrace life’s contradictions, and step forward into freedom and purpose. Transformation isn’t about escaping the void—it’s about finding what’s waiting on the other side.

Sometimes, when we reach for something new, we must first let go of something old. Growth requires space. Ask yourself:

What ideas, habits, or beliefs do you need to release in order to become the person you want to be and create the life you want to live?